tter. It's called the simultaneous sip.

Go. Ah, that's good stuff. Good stuff.

Well, the theme for today is everything is fake except for the things that are real that are corrupt. So you've got things that don't exist and also things that do exist that are totally corrupt and fake. And that's all there is. That's it. So that's going to be the theme for today. See if you can find anything that's real in any of this.

Number one, a new video of an alien shaking hands with a man. Yeah, it's one of the Grays, they say. And the fact that it looks insanely fake should not influence you at all. My favorite part is where it shakes hands with the human. That's right. There are people who think that the Grays shake hands. Okay, okay.

Do you remember I told you all I was all happy yesterday because Amazon finally fixed the link to the hardcover of my book? Because I had a fake link that was a link to the old publisher's listing that was not a real one. So if you tried to buy my book, you would hit the fake link and you'd think it wasn't available in hardcover. So I finally got that taken down yesterday. It's back up. Fake link is back up. Yep.

I believe that Amazon says they have an automated process of some sort that they can remove it, but the automated process will run and put it back. So that only the publisher can take it away, and they don't respond to me. This is not a perfect story. Amazon can't give a correct link, the one they know is correct. So it's not a question of whether they know there's one that's fake. They know it's fake. They can't remove it because they say only the publisher who put it there can do it, and they don't return my messages.

So I'm the only person in the world who has to hire a lawyer to sue somebody just to get listed on Amazon correctly. So today it's lawyer time. So Portfolio Penguin is going to hear from my lawyers today. Now they probably are just ignoring me. It's like they've got better things to do. But I've tried to launch a book and Amazon can't figure out how to put the right link there even when they know the right link. They can't put it there. Incompetence, corruption. And we're in an incompetent cycle like I've never seen. And it's hard to know exactly what's going on here, but nothing works. Nothing works.

I'm still amazed that the media is ignoring the story about President Joe Biden calling those Nazis in Florida very fine people. I mean, can you believe he did that? The president of the United States, Joe Biden, calling Nazis, people who identify as Nazis, very fine people. It's just mind-boggling. And the media is totally ignoring it.

This is my favorite nickname for a public figure. You know I like my own nickname pretty well, Clawed Adams, but this was pretty good. Glitch McConnell instead of Mitch McConnell. He's Glitch McConnell. Yes.

As I wrote in my "Real News" comic that you can generally only see if you're a subscriber on Locals, scientists have found the missing link. You know they're always looking for that missing evolutionary link between apes and humans, but they now have the missing link. It was turtles. It was turtles all the time. So because science is totally legit, and if the scientists say it's true, well who am I? The question is it's not like I'm a scientist. So if the missing link between apes and people is turtles, sounds reasonable to me. Like why would they lie? Now the funny name, the funny thing is the name of the turtle. It's called Mcconnellus speakeri. Mcconnellus speakeri is the name of the turtle they found. You should just assume that nothing I say today is true.

Thomas Massie is getting ready to sue somebody. He's going to file a lawsuit if Biden reinstates the federal mask mandate on airplanes. Sue the government. Can you sue the federal government because of mask mandates? I don't know who you would sue, but he's going to sue somebody. So good for him. At least there's somebody showing some backbone and some pushback.

But you know it's easy if you're sort of in one news bubble to imagine that the rest of the public feels the same way. But at least half of the public thinks that a mask is going to save their lives. I don't want to report this to you because I know how you're going to feel about it, but where I li