Morning.

How are you all doing? Come on in. It’s time. It’s time.

Let me adjust this so you can see the comic behind me. I just like to have it on the screen.

All right. I know why you’re here. Same reason I’m here. Your stocks are up. How about that?

I’m moving a little bit slowly today. My body’s falling apart pretty quickly. But we’ve got good news today. I’ll tell you in a minute.

Good morning, everybody, and welcome to the highlight of human civilization. It’s called Coffee with Scott Adams, and you’ve never had a better time.

But if you’d like to take a chance on elevating this experience up to levels that nobody can even understand with their tiny, shiny human