. And Trump said something or did something authoritarian. Yeah, you did not see that coming.

And other surprises in the news, Adam Schiff is accused of lying. There's a new photo of a UAP, but we couldn't get a clear photo of it. So that catches you up on all the news. Did I leave anything out? No.

Well, here's an update on the simulation. One of the ways I know we live in a simulation, or at least I do, I don't know about you, is that I clearly have themes that would make no sense if it were random. One of the themes is I have continuous water leaks in my life. Now those of you who've been following me for a long time are laughing because you know that it's true. And I even predict them. I tell you, well, I got this one fixed. There's going to be another water leak problem. There always is.

So yesterday, for example, I was in my La-Z-Boy chair and I reclined the La-Z-Boy, which was a bad move because it got my catheter bag stuck in the La-Z-Boy and it yanked a full bag of urine off the hose and started just draining it. Now the good news is I caught it before it got to the chair because the chair had cushions on it, because don't ask, because I've got a leg that's oozing. So it already had waterproofing on it from my leg in general. But so we cleaned that up. Got that all cleaned up.

And this is one of those situations where you like being the disabled guy because I just got to sit there and say, you know, you might have missed some over there. I think you missed some over there. So it turns out if you're not the one cleaning it up, not that big a deal. Not that big a deal.

Then later that night I fell asleep also in the La-Z-Boy and Gary the cat, I woke up maybe 2:30 in the morning and Gary the cat had found a nice little nest in my arm and oh, it was so cute. Gary was just soft and fuzzy and he loved me and he was just right in that crook of the arm. And then I thought, you know what would be good is I feel a little parched, so I'd like to take a sip of water. So I reached over carefully so as not to disturb Gary. Took my water and then very carefully tried to unscrew the cap, but apparently the unscrewing of the cap made some kind of a noise. Couldn't have been that loud. Maybe something like this. And that was just enough to send Gary into a full caddywampus blizzard of arms and legs and tail. And I'm like, "Oh god, no. It's a hurricane of cat parts." And when it settled down, I had a bottle of water all over me and no cat.

So I don't know how you were doing. How you doing?

Anyway, you probably want an update. I'll read some reframes when we get to it. So today will be special. Change your lives.

Anyway, some of you want my cancer updates. Here are some words that you might want to know if you're talking to somebody else about what's what, at least in cancer treatment in my case. So Dr. Pat Soon-Shiong, he's got something called the bio shield technology which I already have in me. There will be more of it coming. Maybe you'll get some NK and T cells. Those would be helping my immunity. But then separately there's this thing called Pluvicto that I have one of the upcoming, what will be a total of six doses over six weeks. So that's just in the process.

At the moment I'm weirdly pain-free and I don't want to trust that yet because you know the whole goal is to get pain-free. So at the moment no pain. I have no pain relievers. Well, actually I do, but not very strong. And it never made a difference before, so I'm pretty sure that's not making a big difference. Anyway, but I do have some terrible wounds on my legs for some cancer-y reason. I don't know. But those are pretty bad. But those are being treated no problem at all.

All right. So let's go to my book, Reframe Your Brain. I decided what I would do is I'd read some reframes out of the section on social life. Does anybody here need a better social life? You want me to reframe it for you? So I've got a whole bunch of reframes that will help your social life.

All right, let's do these. Some of these you've heard, but they're all worth hearing more than once because it'll just really pack it in there.

So the usual frame is people will tell you to be yourself. You ever hear that? Do you ever have somebody in your life who will say, "Well, Scott, the secret to success is you should be yourself." To which I say, shouldn't I be a better version of myself? If I'm just myself, am I not going to be a little bit suboptimal? Are you telling me that doing whatever I feel like is somehow going to be giving me a good life? I don't think it works like that at all. No, you should not try to be yourself. You should always strive to be some improved better version of whatever you think is the best you can be and you should be shooting for that. It gives you something to do. Much better system to continuously be chasing the better version of you and you never get there. That's the key. You never get there.

All right. YouTube is live streaming. Yes, it is.

All right. Here's another one. These are social life reframes from my book, Reframe Your Brain. Changing lives everywhere.

This one's similar, but you can pick which one you like. The usual frame would be you should learn to love yourself as you are. Should you do that? Should you really love yourself as you are? Well, if it's unchangeable, then yes, why not? You know, something that can't be changed. But you shouldn't be glad your brain is pestering you to improve. So if you have a brain that keeps saying you should be doing more, a lot of people complain about that because they think, "Oh man, I'm always feeling inadequate. I'm feeling like I'm not doing enough." Well, maybe you're not. And maybe this is exactly what should be happening. Maybe your brain should be telling you why don't you do a little more, you know, try a little harder. That might be the healthiest situation you could be in. So don't be mad if your brain is pestering you to improve. You should thank it.

You ever see somebody who needs your advice? It's really hard to give advice, isn't it? Have you ever noticed that you almost can't give advice? And the reason is nobody wants to feel like you know more than they do. Especially a peer. They never want to say, you know, if you just do what I tell you to do, then your life will be good. That's not really, people aren't comfortable with that. Not at all.

So instead of giving people advice which they will just automatically reject, you give them information or maybe empathy or maybe there's something specific they need help organizing their thoughts. But don't ever put it in the form of, you know, if I were you, my advice. It's better to just give them information that they don't have. You know, such as, did you know this website has this information? That's not really advice. That's just telling them something. Telling people something works. That's good.

All right. How about this one? Here's one I learned many years ago when I worked at a resort. People would come in and they would complain and we were taught to take on a work order, like a physical piece of paper, a work order, and write down the complaint right in front of them because that would make them feel like they're doing more. So we'd take the work order, write down what they said, and then we were actually told this by our boss, I'm not making this up, that depending on the complaint, it might not be something you could fix. Some people, guests at the hotel, would complain about things like they need a certain different mattress or something and there just basically there's no way to make that happen. So instead of making it happen, we were taught to write it down as if we were going to make it happen and then throw it away after they leave.

And the thinking behind this is that what people really wanted was to be heard. Now they would also like their little complaint to be fixed, but even bigger than that, they want to make sure they complained, you heard it, and they felt powerful because some action happened as far as they know. So yeah. So it was purely a theatrical situation.

All right. People who complain don't want solutions. Sometimes they just like complaining. That's the reframe.

Do you ever meet somebody who had a strong personality? Do you ever hear anybody described that way? Oh. I'm going to introduce you to Beth. Beth has a, well, Beth has a, how do I say this, strong personality. Run. Run from Beth. You do not want to be around people with strong personalities because that's just a way to hide the fact that somebody's hard to deal with. Somebody might be a little bit toxic, if you know what I mean. Strong personality. Indeed, you're toxic.

I've told you before that if you have a compliment in mind, that's almost immoral to withhold it. So that sort of a reframe. You've heard this one before, but it's worth doing again. Giving somebody a compliment just automatically puts them on your side till the end of time. So it's good for them if it's a sincere compliment and it's good for you. So why wouldn't you do it as much as you could? Well, you don't want to be like a weirdo over-complimenter, but it's hard to get there to be an over-complimenter because when somebody is receiving the compliment, they never feel like it's too much. So just pour it on. Just pour on the compliments.

Now I do that in my personal life, but the rule is it has to be real. Like you actually have to mean it. It doesn't count if you're just, "Oh, what would be a good compliment?" That doesn't count. It should be something you're thinking and then you just say it. That really counts.

All right. How about this? No one seems to find me attractive or no one wants to date me or nobody wants to marry me. The reframe of that is you just haven't met enough people. You could take anyone in the world and just introduce them to people over and over again and eventually they'd find somebody they fell in love with. It's just sort of a numbers game. So there's no such thing as not being able to find somebody who likes you. There's only such a thing as have not yet met enough people because if you meet enough people, the numbers are on your side. Sooner or later you're going to meet somebody you like and vice versa.

Here's one. I need to, this would be the usual frame. I need to go find someone to be my romantic partner. Have you ever had that thought that you need to go out and find yourself a romantic partner? And you're actually thinking of it that way. You're not just thinking, "Oh, whatever happens happens." But you're thinking, "I'm going to go find myself a romantic partner. That's what I need."

Well, that's the old way of thinking of it. It would be better to say you need to signal your genetic advantage to attract a romantic partner. What I mean by that is if you can somehow signal that you're better than most people at some task, some skill, could be mental, could be physical. You're either the best at a sport, you're the best at chess, you're the best at making money, you're the best at just knowing things. So there are a million things you could be the best at, or just one of the best wherever you are. And instead of trying to turn somebody into your romantic partner, which is weird and creepy, all you do is you just live your life. But you make sure that other people notice that as you're living your life, you're doing something really well. Then people will want to meet with you. You have to look like you have at least one genetic, some kind of oddity or advantage. Doesn't matter what it is. Could be mental, could be physical, could be attractiveness. You got to have at least one thing that people look at and go, "Oh, that's kind of special."

And if you do not have even one thing in your life, not even one thing that you do better than other people, nothing, well then you develop that. Usually all you need to do to be one of the best at anything, I know this is an exaggeration of course but you get the point, is to do it more than other people. You can be the best tennis player you know by playing more tennis than the people you know. You just do it for a long time and then pretty soon you're the best tennis player you know. So look for something where you can be the impressive one no matter what that is.

All right. Here's one. Sometimes your partner or your mate, let's say your romantic partner, will ask you to share in the decision. And what are you thinking when that happens? Oh no, my partner wants to blame me when we picked the wrong restaurant or something. No, I don't want to share in these decisions. But instead of saying that, you need a co-pilot to share the blame. I think it's funnier if you just say, "Hey, I need somebody to share the blame. So what restaurant you want to go to?" No, I think that would be funny. Now this one's just for fun.

All right. A lot of people used to think that marriage was about finding your soulmate. How many of you think that? Well some of you think you did find your soulmate, and so you would say, "Yes, that's exactly what it is." And if you were as awesome as me, you would have found yours too. But I would say that marriage is not about finding a soulmate. I think marriage is about finding love with someone who values promises. That's one you have to think about. You might have to play that one back because there's a book worth of thinking in that one thought. So marriage is not about finding your soulmate. The reframe is marriage is about finding love with someone who values promises. It's not obvious why that works, is it? I'm going to leave that one there and that'll be your homework. Just think about it.

All right. Some other soulmates. Oh, here's one that I heard from a friend. I'm not sure where it came from. Oh, I think it came from Dr. Seuss, but it's a good one. If you're in a relationship that ends, instead of crying about your relationship ending, wouldn't it be better to smile because it happened? So don't cry about it ending. Be happy that it ever happened. That one I use all the time. I think you can convince yourself to be happy that something happened.

Let's see. Here's one for dealing with your teen that I've never seen work. So maybe this one's a bad idea, but you could try it at home. If you try it at home and it doesn't work or it does work, let me know. But here's the idea. So this would be for a teen. The usual frame is you tell your teen they can't understand the reason for what you're telling them. Do you ever tell your kid because I said so? And that's considered good parenting, right? Because I said so. Why do I have to go to bed at midnight? Because I say so. That's fine.

But if you've got one of those teens who's ultra-rational to the point of being a pain in the ass, and some of you do, and they want to debate you, here's the ultimate teenager debate killshot. It goes like this. A parent is able to guide a young brain. They're not capable of understanding adult reasons. Now you'd want to put that in your own words, but the idea is that the teenage brain is incomplete. So no adult over the age of 25 should have a debate with somebody who is under 25 because the under-25s don't even have a developed brain. What would be the point of that? So the point of the adult guiding the younger person is the adult has a mature brain.

So if I disagree with a teen, I don't say, "You're wrong. I'm right." Because that's just a fight. You say, "Ah, that's probably what I would have thought before my brain was mature." You see the difference? Yeah, that's probably what I would have thought before my brain was mature. Oh, I thought that when I was your age too. But my job as the adult is to navigate you through a place where your brain is not yet developed enough to handle the situation. So whenever you and I disagree about what you should be doing next, the smart play is to listen to me because I've been there before. The worst play is to listen to yourself because we don't know about you, but I've done all those things. You haven't. So listen to the more mature brain. Try that more mature brain approach. See how that works. It won't work. I'm still waiting for the one person that works with. Mostly the other ones will work with everybody, but that one's pretty specific.

All right. Oh, here's one. What if people treat you poorly? And you find out there's not much you can do about it. What do you do about that? People treat you poorly and you're thinking there's not much you can do about it. Well, here's the reframe. The reframe is that you cause people to treat you the way they do. People don't treat you the way they do for their own reasons. There's something you project. Could be your look, could be your mannerism, could be the situation that you appeared in, but you largely cause people to treat you the way they treat you. And this is something you don't notice until you reach a certain age. Because when you're young, it's really hard to get anybody to treat you well because adults just don't care and other teenagers, you know, they have no special respect for you. You're just another kid.

So anyway, just assume that the way you act causes people to see you the way they see you. And when they see you the way they see you, that's how they decide how to act. So you can basically hypnotize them just by who you are and how you act.

All right. How about this one? Oh, this one I used the other day. This is a brilliant one. The old reframe is that the boss is in charge. Obviously, right? The boss by definition of being a boss is clearly in charge. But if you think that, it leaves some opportunities on the table. So I prefer a reframe. Instead of the boss is in charge, it's more true to say the person with the best ideas is always in charge. Because if the boss doesn't have any good ideas, where are they going to get one? From somebody else. If you're the person who has a good idea, people are going to do what you want them to do because you're the only one with a good idea. So don't think in terms of power all the time. Sometimes you have to think in terms of having the best idea, having the most useful solution, being the person that they want to invite to be on the projects. Think in those terms.

Then there's the basket case theory. The theory that most people look like they have their act together and you think to yourself, I wish I were like that person. They have their act together, but they don't know that I don't. No, that's not what's happened. I can almost guarantee you that other people do not have their act together. They might act like they do, but that is just an act. So the basket case theory is that everyone's a basket case once you get to know them. The only people who are not basket cases are people you just don't know well enough. But if you did, you'd know. Basket case.

All right. Here's a really important one that I try to live by. I try not to judge people by their mistakes. Have you heard me say that before? Don't judge people by their mistakes. And boy, is that hard not to do. Instead, judge them by how they respond to their mistake. Do they correct something? Do they change something? Do they apologize? Do they make it right? Because that's the person I want. If you're looking for people who don't make mistakes, well good luck. You're not going to do too well with that. But what if you find people who do make mistakes like everybody, but they're really good at dealing with a mistake? Well, that's gold. That is what you want.

All right, two more. I'm going to skip that one. Ooh, here's one. The usual frame. You've heard this before. It's an old saying that small acts of kindness can go a long way. Small acts of kindness. I would reframe this to say that there are no small acts of kindness. Any act of kindness will seem huge to the recipient. It only seems small to you.

And that ladies and gentlemen is most of but not all the reframes in the social life chapter of Reframe Your Brain.

Now if you're just checking in you may have found that X wasn't wor