Coffee With Scott Adams — Knowledge Archive August 22, 2026
Scott Adams Philosophy Archive
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one of those things you should have on there. Now I've taken a course in statistics in college but it was a million years ago. I don't remember a lot of the math. But you can develop let's say a statistical intuition about things. You can get to the point where you could look at say this aspirin study and say, "Oh the number of people studied was small. The way they studied it is not as good stati…

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y. China of course can find that guy, right? So there's no question about those two facts. We've told them who it is, who's the fentanyl kingpin in China. China knows where he is. They could stop him. Does anybody doubt that they can stop that guy? No, of course not.

So we have to assume it's intentional and that they are killing 50 to 70,000 Americans per year intentionally as a plan. Now that's war, isn't it? But given the nature of all the obstacles and variables in the world we can't just sort of attack China militarily. We just do this weird thing where we demand that they stop and then they just don't because they don't have to apparently. There's no penalty.

So to me it seems that Mexico and the cartels are a combined allied military force in a war with the United States. Now we can't attack China because they have nukes and stuff. But we can certainly attack their ally who holds territory. And their allies hold the border territory. If you didn't know this the cartels actually are the government on the border. Literally they're the government. The actual government wouldn't even be—they would be too afraid to even go there because they would kill the actual government. They're just not allowed. So for all practical purposes Mexico is not even on our border. We don't have a Mexican border. But I'd like one. Let's see if we can get one.

So the way to get a Mexican border for the first time is to get rid of this small, let's say unlabeled country owned by the cartels. Different cartels but they have different parts of it, right? And I think that we should at least consider annexing that territory that Mexico doesn't control.

Now you would say to yourself, "Whoa, whoa, you've gone way too far. The government of Mexico is never going to allow you to annex part of that territory." To which I say, wouldn't that be great? Wouldn't it be great if Mexico surged their government military into that area to protect it from the United States annexing it? That'd be fine. Then we don't have to annex it because if the Mexican military tried to defend it they would move their military into that zone and that's all we wanted in the first place. We want Mexico to be on our border. So if Mexico wants to be on our border we'll help. But of course the real Mexican government is afraid of the cartel, as they should be, so they can't really do that.

So what would they do if we just annexed it? Just took it and said we're not taking it from Mexico. Mexico doesn't own it. And here's the best part. If Mexico wants it back they can have it. Just ask. All you have to do is control it. Just move your military in, control the border. We'll give it right back to you. You can have it back. But if you don't want to do that it's not Mexico and it's not the United States. It's China. And I don't want a border with China right now. We have one. They happen to be the cartel working with China. But for all practical purposes we just got ourselves a border with China and they are invading and attacking over the border. So I would treat it like a Chinese military exercise.

And when Mexico complains you say, "Oh I hear what you're saying but it's not really about us. This isn't about the United States and Mexico. We don't have any complaints with Mexico at all, not the Mexican government. We have a complaint with China who is working with this cartel, these cartels who own this territory. This has nothing to do with you. But if you would like it to be about you we would like that too. You could join us. But until then it's war with China and we'll just treat it that way."

In the comments somebody says this idea is so crazy it could work. Let me tell you about "so crazy it could work." That's exactly right. That's exactly right. The idea is not so much that you would actually annex it but you would change the frame. You would reframe the situation from an immigration problem, a drug problem, a crime problem. Because that's not getting us anywhere, is it? The way we currently frame and think about the border is giving us nothing but worse problems. If you reframe how you think about it that opens up options. You don't necessarily know where that ends up. It could end up with Mexico just defending their own border better. That'd be fine. But the reframe just gets you out of the broken and bankrupt way of thinking.

The bankrupt way of thinking is that we have a crime immigration problem at the border. That's just not what's going on. What's going on is that China is attacking the United States right now successfully and we're not defending against an attack by China. Mexico, you're just not part of the question. I wish you were. Honestly I wish you were part of the question but you're not. The cartels are.

All right. This will just make your head spin for a while. I believe there's another sexual category and I'm just going to put this out there and then you won't accept this at first but wait till you look into it, okay? Some of you will be able to go home immediately and ask somebody for confirmation. Most of you won't. But watch what happens when you do.

If you said to a let's say a teenage girl in the United States in 2021—so just your average teenage girl—and you say to that teenage girl, "What is your orientation?" They'll tell you. They'll say I'm either straight or I'm gay or I'm bi. And they'll tell you just right now. So at least in today's world I don't see at least nothing like it used to be in terms of anybody saying that they're gay or they're lesbian or anything else. So the first thing that would be eye-opening is that a teenager today is far more likely to

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just be completely open about what their sexuality is. Here's the shocking part. Ask a girl who identifies as heterosexual, not bisexual. They have to identify as heterosexual. And then ask this question: would you ever marry a woman? There was a time if you asked somebody who identified as heterosexual, "Would you ever marry somebody of the same gender?" they would have said, "Well no. What do y…

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